So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize