ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize