My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Dignity is for republicans.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
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