At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize