I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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