my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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