I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
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Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
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You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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