the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Randomize