There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize