Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
high people should be assigned attendants
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I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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