The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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