These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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