Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize