Do vagina's smell?
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
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It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
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My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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