I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
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she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
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The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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