Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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