Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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