i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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