Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
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