Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fucked my hip out of place.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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