Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize