I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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