My pussy is not your playground.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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