I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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