i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
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