She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize