This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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