I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
My ass is underappreciated
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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