We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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