You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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