Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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