Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
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well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
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