Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Randomize