And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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