I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
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