Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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