he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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