That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
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