Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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