there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
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