After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
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I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
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Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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