if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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