capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
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I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
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Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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