is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
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