Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize