i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize