their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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