I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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