Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You made out with two different species that night
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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