you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize